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There was a kid in my fourth grade class named Izzy Fetterman – any relation, I wonder?... I still tell the folks working at Safeway that they are heroes in my book… I’m not sure who this Harry Styles kid is, but if he can keep Robert Pine’s son awake during an interview, he’s okay in my book…..Look up “underrated” in the dictionary, and there, my friends, you will find a photo of one Trea Turner…. I like Republicans. I really do. It’s just those right-wing religious nuts that drive me batty. Gimme Ike….. You gotta wonder: are the lads on that team on “Ted Lasso” actors or real soccer players trying out acting? Either way, they are “brilliant” as they say across the pond....I eat three blueberry blintzes every Saturday morning and I am better off for it….For my money, there is no better broadcaster alive than Kelly Ripa -- unless it’s Mika Brzezinski….I wonder if it is still possible to get a good Arbor Day greeting card… Give me Top Gun 2 over Iron Eagle 2 any day….What Republican state legislators are doing passing new anti-abortion laws this very month is like if Democratic legislators were passing new bills this close to Election Day creating new sanctuary states….Kenan Thompson just gets funnier and funnier…. Has anyone under 40 eaten a bialy? Or heard of a bialy?....Michael Jordan was right: Republicans buy sneakers too… Paging Lin-Manuel Miranda! Broadway needs a hit show! Stat!....Digital this, digital that – give me an old timey pocket watch any day of the week…. Brooklyn’s own Chuck Schumer has got tougher decisions to make on this big spending bill than he ever faced at the Junior’s cheesecake counter….Put away your Glenn Fords and your Lee Marvins. There's NEVER been a star like Tom Cruise….They can keep playing all the Super Bowls they want, but they will never make a coach tougher than Chuck Noll…. This Glenn Youngkin fella is governor of Virginia and has a 55 percent job approval rating – and he would still lose a Republican presidential primary to Donald Trump by 62-28??....I’m thinking, what would Herb Caen make of Twitter?…When I was a kid, I loved hail, but now if I never see it again it would not bother me…. I tuned in to Bill Murray. I laughed at Bill Murray. Ryan Reynolds, you're no Bill Murray…..Who doesn’t like a good souvenir, but I can’t figure out why Donald took that stuff to Florida….Congratulations to Matt Damon and Jennifer Lopez – greatest couple since Joltin’ Joe and Marilyn!...I love ice hockey but it’s hard to remember any of the action the next day…. I wouldn’t want to live off the difference between how much Jay Leno loves cars and how much Jerry Seinfeld loves cars…. RIP Anne Garrels….When you really think about it, there ain’t no park like Central Park….What the hell happened to the Red Sox this year??.... New Hampshire Senator Maggie Hassan says Joe Biden’s comments on those MAGA Republicans "painted with way too broad a brush" but I think they paint differently up there in New England…Gas prices might be down but my local Lebanese place is still charging a buck fifty for a falafel ball… Somewhere up there Vin Scully’s smiling about the Dodgers 19 game lead over the Padres… If Larry David ever stops making “Curbs,” I think I will give up my television set…Quick! Who is the Secretary of Agriculture?... The last time I was at Duke Ziebart’s, I upgraded from the filet mignon to the ribeye and didn’t regret it one single bit…. This year's Fall Classic may be a Subway Series between the Yanks and Mets but I'll be taking an Uber. …The late beloved Ivana would've made a helluva First Lady… You’ve got your Brooklyn Bridge and your Tower Bridge and your Sydney Harbor Bridge but for me the only bridge that does it is the Golden Gate. Now that’s a bridge!.… You want to lower student debt? How about getting Starbucks not to charge 5 bucks for a cuppa joe?.... Listening to my buddies Michael Smerconish and Mark Halperin talk about the presidential prospects of Ron DeSantis brings me back to the days of Dick and Tommy Smothers….All the kids are playing this Wordle thing but I’m good with canasta forever….There are 100 Senators but only one Dr. Oz…
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Correction: In Wednesday’s edition, I wrote that if he became president in 2025, Ron DeSantis would be the youngest Republican ever, when I meant to write the youngest elected GOP president in U.S. history. I didn’t forget Teddy Roosevelt, I just wrote it wrong. Given that I did that entire edition from scratch starting yesterday morning, it is amazing there weren’t more typos or mistakes. However, I deeply regret that error.
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